Average Friday

Friday night I was so tired I was writing my post for the night and fell asleep!

Friday was pretty average. Like every Friday for the last few months I took mom to the Clearview Cancer Institute, but today was just a labs day instead of chemo. Which meant instead of 2-3 hours we were there like 15 minutes. Hallelujah!

My mission for that day was to find an Asian market because I was craving some of the Filipino dish pancit like nobodies business. Len’s mom and aunt would make the noodle dish usually every weekend or every other weekend when his family would get together. It is sooo delicious. There are a lot of food stuff that they would make in California that I miss, but as long as it isn’t super crazy ingredients or to many, I don’t see why I can’t attempt to make it! So anyway, I found a place in a slightly shady looking strip mall in Huntsville (I believe most of Huntsville is shady looking anyway) but the place was much nicer inside. Got my noodles and a can of Lychee in syrup (yum!) and had a piece of free plum candy which did taste just like a plum!

After my mission was complete we hit up the Wal-Mart for moms medicine (which they didn’t have ready after an hour and a half, so we are going back Sunday) and a couple of essentials. I got a lot of good walking in because I decided since mom was in the car I would go from one end of the store to the other to pick items up. So for example, I went to the pharmacy, then went to get milk (on the other end), back past the pharmacy to get cat litter, then back to near the milk to get some string cheese, went back to the pet section and got a 1.00 catnip toy, then back to the other side to grab a subway sandwich for our lunch, then back to the pharmacy, then back near subway to check out. I know it sounds a little crazy, but it was good exercise because I walked kinda fast (faster than I would if mom was with me).

Afterward we went home and basically my day turned into a food crap fest and lazy. I must have eaten everything in sight and I don’t know why! My issue with it is that I KNOW I’m doing it, and I don’t make myself stop. I don’t say to myself, “Hey, eating that wouldn’t be good for you. Lets just put it back.” No .. I say, “Hey, eating that wouldn’t be good for you, but oh well it’s really good and I want it.” What is wrong with me!? I actually got pretty depressed about the stuff I ate afterward (which is the usual vicious cycle) but I started to play a game which took my mind off everything until I had to start dinner.

Dinner was baked pork chops, baked potatoes (though not baked, microwaved), and corn. Not a terrible dinner, but I am pretty sure I ate way to much of it.Β  Food and I need to have an intervention. I’m still not sure what to do except count calories even though I didn’t want to, I just wanted to eat healthier except eating a ton of healthy stuff is still not good. I’m thinking I am going to go with 1400 calories, which was what my goal calories was when I was following the JillianMichaels.com site. That low amount of calories would really force me to eat less, which is what I really need because I eat way to much.

My to-do list was pretty small today, I’ve slacked off on some of my morning/night routine so have not been counting it if I don’t do it all. I’ve had fold/put away laundry on my list for about 5 days now (which is what the asterisks mean!) Saturday ends my week and I will be thinking up some new goals and things to start Sunday, and another week to get my routine down.

Pictures from the day πŸ™‚

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So today was fairly boring in a way. All I did all day was move things around rearranging furniture. I took some pictures of a couple big pieces of furniture and put them on craigslist to sell. Got a few bites already, so hopefully they sell!

Having date night with the boyfriend πŸ™‚ Going to enjoy the rest of my evening!

Cleaning Cleaning!

Not to much to report on today.

I procrastinated most of the day. Changing habits is so very hard. I can feel myself slipping into just procrastination mode again and I really need to really get some goals going so I stay on top of things. I have been doing well with blogging this week so far and I am enjoying it so it doesn’t seem like i’ll be skipping this any time soon. My only problem being that by the time I get to bed lately i’m so tired my blogging is just half-assed. I don’t want that. My routine seems to be slipping away but tomorrow is a new day and I am going to start it right the way i planned.

I did decide I couldn’t push my to-do list back anymore, the list was getting longer and longer every day! The point of this was to do a few things every day, not wait until the last day and do a weeks worth of things! My big project for today was cleaning the small bathroom. Now, you may think ‘no biggie’, except I don’t think the small bathroom has had a full cleaning since my mom moved here. Let me explain a little about where we live. I live in a trailer that my brothers bought in order to fix up and make livable and pay off for my mom had somewhere to live without having to pay rent. Well, my brothers got it set up, semi fixed up and now mom lives here. The problem being .. it’s not finished. There are walls that are still not dry-walled, the floor in the small bathroom has a hole in the floor that leads right outside and we have to keep a piece of cardboard over it, there are pipes under my bed because where I sleep used to be where a whirlpool tub was, none of our rooms have doors on them except the big bathroom and the front and back exits, and our floor has no carpeting just the plywood. So yea .. no one likes to clean apparently and I swept the mountain of dust that had accumulated into the hole in the floor of the bathroom. I then proceeded to scrub the floor on hands and knees and the floor is now WHITE, holy cow! The bathroom is decorated nicely, and now the rest of the bedroom is a mess with the piles of stuff that had made its way to holding in that small room. Ugh. More cleaning tomorrow!!

I need to take some serious blogging time and do out some goals. I need to give myself something to work towards food wise because ‘just eating healthier’ isn’t working for me. I guess I DO need to start keeping track of stuff, but I don’t want to overwhelm myself with to much change at once. We will see tomorrow.

Long long day ..

So yesterday was .. well .. long.

Mom had cataract surgery yesterday so there was just a lot of waiting around for me to do. It did go well and she is already starting to see better, neat-o!

Well, we had to waste 4 hours between when she had the surgery and when she had to come back for post-op stuff, so we went to a butcher shop to see about any deals, got a couple of things. Then we went to bridgestreet (a local outside mall type place) around here and I pushed mom around it in her wheelchair. I was pretty happy with that activity as my exercise for the day. Even the really yummy low-fat mango tart froyo with kiwi slices didn’t make me feel at all guilty! When I got home .. that was a whole other issue.

I couldn’t stop eating. I think it was a culmination of relationship stress and this happens to me a lot when I eat healthy throughout the day and actually get exercise and then it’s like BAM eating overload! It wasn’t good for me stuff either like fruit. To much cereal and then rice and leftovers and it was crazy. Most of the times when I eat like that it doesn’t phase me until a bit after. Like I don’t even realize I’m eating stuff and then it was like, ‘oh i ate what?‘ It’s a little crazy. We were suppose to have Brinner (Breakfast for Dinner!) but mom had a really long nap, and no one else was home. I ended up cooking up sausage but not eating any until late, and again I ate way to many. I need to figure out something different with my food.

I didn’t get ANY of my to-do list finished! That is why this is being posted Wednesday morning, instead of Tuesday night. I was hanging out with my sister so bedtime was much later than I wanted and by the time I got into my room I was so tired I was like ‘i’ll sit down for one second and say good night to my boyfriend‘ and then, i woke up the next day haha. I need to really get some stuff done today because there are NO doctors appointments or any reason for me to go anywhere so i’ll have plenty of time to do stuff. WOO!

I took a couple of pictures yesterday, but then had a camera scare and I thought it was broke. It’s not, it’s all good!! Will post them later!

What title?

Not much went on today, and it was a decent day actually.

Mom had two Dr. Appointments today, and the one we thought would take awhile didn’t so we were able to see the second doctor early. Went to wal-mart for some essentials; milk, eggs etc. I was gungho about going home and having a sandwich but mom wanted to get some Long John Silvers. Well, I am still learning this whole self control thing, and she wanted to share something so .. there went my no more fast food pact. Seriously though, NO MORE FAST FOOD!!! I even made her say it! Although what she got wasn’t the best (fried) I took all the fried bready parts off my fish and ate it naked. The food, not me! I felt better about it that way!

Pretty much hung out at home for the rest of the day, helped organize some stuff with my sister and I cooked my sister-in-laws chicken and rice recipe and it FINALLY came out perfect!! I didn’t get any pictures but you will have to take my word for it haha. Accomplished a few things on my list but not everything, had a lazy phase during the day.

I’m trying to not be really disappointed in myself for not following my routine to a T or doing everything on my list. Things happens, I can’t be perfect, there will be times when it is side-tracked but I need to learn I can pick up and continue on getting back into my routine. I can’t give up, I can’t let it get me down, and I CAN learn good habits. I am worth this effort I am putting into myself to become a better person and feel like a better person!

Productive Day

I. Am. Exhausted.

Lets start with saying I did not go to bed till 5:30am THIS MORNING! I know right?! What happened to that 11pm bedtime? I had good intentions, I even closed my computer after I said I would last night and then proceeded to toss and turn for 2.5 hours until I finally turned computer back on to see if the boyfriend was awake (which he was thankfully). The terrible part of staying up SO late for me is that is when depression hits me the hardest. I didn’t really realize that until I started reading Learned Optimism (thanks again Kendall!) and there was a blurb about the times depression is the worst, and thinking back it’s so true for me. Well, last night was no exception. I got hit bad, starting thinking some really bad things (nothing suicidal, just how stupid I am etc.) mostly about the distance between my boyfriend and I (2000+ miles). I am so glad he has been super amazing through all of this, especially my depression, and he seems to just roll with it. I love you baby!

Anyway, so yea .. got about 3.5 hours of sleep and the only time the lack of sleep really affected me was waking up. Boy was I groggy, and kept putting my head back on the pillows. ugh. We were late getting to my sisters, but oh well! Now, don’t get me wrong, I didn’t carry the couches, or the big screen tv they had (which we have inherited for now weee!) but I did my fair share of moving boxes and small pieces of furniture. It was hot here, as usual, but the sweat wasn’t from standing in the humidity but from doing stuff and that felt really good. Plus whenever I get sun(burn) I always feel like it was a good day. I know, I’m weird. I didn’t actually think we were going to take ALL day long, but we did 3-4 cars full of stuff trips several times to the storage shed she rented.

My sister doesn’t just come with herself. She also comes with 4 birds. We have 3 cats. I am worried. The cats were pretty curious, Bo was trying to poke them already but I really think it was more curiosity and ‘oooh whats this long thing that I can bat at’ (tail feathers) type of deal. I hope they stay in the room tonight and not bug the birds!

Today was pretty okay food wise. Had a piece of home-made bread, toasted, with some spread and a glass of milk. Around noon I stopped at the store and picked up sandwich stuff for everyone so I ended up having a bologne & cheese w/mayo sandwich .. should have skipped the mayo. I snacked on the meat and cheese off and on throughout the rest of the day, and when we got home it was like snack-a-palooza. I couldn’t seem to stop eating while everyone was figuring out what we had to buy for dinner. I ate a peach, half of my leftover half of chinese from last night, a leftover chicken thigh, some milk. It was like .. omg stooop. So I quickly said I would use the rest of our frozen hamburger, make some rice, and veggies and there was dinner instead of having to go allll the way to the store. So that’s what I did, and with the drippings from the hamburger my sister made some really delish (probably not very healthy) gravy to go on the rice. I love gravy and rice. I think I did pretty well portion wise with that dinner. All in all, not all that healthy, but I did well with my portions I think.

My to-do list went okay today. Didn’t get everything on the list done, but that’s alright, it was a busy day!

Here’s some pictures.

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Being Accountable

I don’t know what time I fell asleep last night, waiting for conversation that never came, but I woke up around noon. Alright, it wasn’t around noon, it WAS noon exactly. I hate waking up so late and if I know I don’t actually have to be up (like for a job or an appointment) I always sleep through my alarms or snooze them. I was doing really well while I had to be up with mom to help her get around the house because she normally is an early riser, but now that I know I don’t have to it seems I can’t wake up earlier than the afternoon. I’m sure my depression doesn’t help and neither does going to bed at 2am. I am declaring this my second weekly goal, going to bed at a decent hour.

While cleaning out some programs from my computer and thinking about how I can organize a routine I thought, I need some post-it notes on my computer since I’m always on it. So I googled it and found these Sticky Notes and so far I am liking it. I’m on my way to being organized!! I know some of the things are like DUH i do them anyway, but I need to learn to get healthy habits and stick with them, so adding it to my routine is just making sure I stick with everything.

Started the bread just as a huuuuge storm crashed into us, it was pretty crazy! It turned out great! At least I think so for my first ever loaf of bread! I got 20 slices out of it, for 97 calories a slice and 16 carbs. I only keep track of carbs because of my moms diabetes, so I may have to see about any low carb bread recipes out there!

I slowly did the things on my to-do list, though the rain put a damper on one or two. I’m not complaining though, I’d rather have this rain than the 106 degree humidity of the last week or so. Yea, you heard right. 106 humidity. *shudder*

Dinner was Chinese food, and though in general you can get some good stuff with Chinese food, I didn’t make very good choices. I ordered Mongolian Beef, which was good, and I DID only eat half of the rice & main course (which is a big improvement for me!). I had ordered a small thing of bbq boneless spare ribs, and somehow managed to eat the whole container 😦 .. I WILL do better tomorrow. I didn’t eat anything else for the rest of the night, and I didn’t really have a whole lot to eat during the day.

I can only hope that means California!

So did I finish what I set out to do today? Well .. see for yourself!

It’s almost 12:30am right now, and I am planning on going to bed as SOON as I post this! Not my 11 cut off time, but this is only the first day of my routine, so I’m gonna chalk this up as a win anyway.

So here’s the bread pictures, a storm video, more bread pictures, and finally the recipe! Along with some just regular pics!

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